Dateline Alaska: The not-so-happy state.
I wish there were less than 24 hours in a day. I’m bored, bored, bored.
My marriage is dead. Todd speaks with a forked tongue, and I think he might just be bug fuck crazy.
He keeps trying to exhume the rotting corpse of our life together. Today he wrote me a poem:
I must go down to the sea again,
To the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship,
And a tanker with which to collide.
I’m not sure whether I am the tall ship, or the tanker in that medley of hodgepodge. I think it might be all about him wanting to have sex with me – his tall ship bumping into my tanker?. Guilty feet got no rhythm Todd.
Tame my ticker, good news at last:
$63,500 is winning bid on Sarah Palin dinner auction
“So, who did win? Cathy Maples, the owner of a defense contracting company in Alabama. She thinks Sarah Palin is pretty swell, and hopes she gets to be president some day”.
Since Todd and I are no longer together, I’ll need to organise a blind date.
Just finished composing an ad for online dating site rsvp.com:
“Wanted, for dinner of right wing cliches, false analogies, non sequiturs, bent facts and weird prophesies, a man. Peep into the magical world of Sarah Palin. If you’re into historical nonsense about the political glory days of 2008 – combined with maudlin romance, call me. Proponent of arctic oil drilling preferred. No Muslims or Eskimos. Sarah. p.s. must be fan of Billy Ray Cyrus. p.p.s if you’re Billy Ray Cyrus, even better.”
The red mists of rage will descend on Todd when he reads that.
Wink.
Now I have to go and mix fodder for the cattle. Not only has this breakup been been painful, difficult, and inconvenient – I’m always filthy.
Why has my life become drudgery since Todd’s mother-of-all betrayals?.
Yours, while gazing into my crystal ball, darkly
Sarah
p.s. In the lab of life, minor celebrities shouldn’t be expected to know the rules of grammar.
Check out my new website – it’s French regency with a modern twist: The Sarah Palin Experience
